Monday, August 29, 2011

Birthday Guidelines

Last Thursday was my birthday. Well, Thursday was the actual day...but technically it was my birthday week. I like to really embrace my big day by celebrating with everyone I can during the month of August.

There are a few things I think that no one should have to do on their birthday. You shouldn't have to clean up cat throw up...especially within the first hour of being up. Maybe they think it is a nice present, but it really isn't. You shouldn't have to clean the rabbit cage. At all. That is not a gift. You shouldn't have to have a cold sore on your birthday. That's just not right. You shouldn't have to work on your birthday. I think all companies should give their employees the day off and refuse to let them work on their big day. You shouldn't have to get up early on your birthday...unless you want to. I had to get up early because I had to work. That is doubly bad.

You should go out for dinner on your birthday. You should let others wait on you and cook for you because you spend the other 364 days of the year waiting on others. At least "us ladies" usually do. All your family and friends should call you, email you, and text you saying "Happy Birthday!" and "Enjoy your day!" Your father should call you, no matter how old you are, and sing Happy Birthday to you, just like he has for years.

You should get great presents...and I don't mean big presents.You should get things you were hoping for along with some great little surprises like a 2-year Lilly Pulitzer agenda book, a watercolor book, a new Lilly koozie (you should always have a koozie in your purse at parties...why not look great while enjoying a beer?), and some adorable pink jewelry.

You should make time to celebrate your birthday weekend with your friends... especially, camping with friends. You should camp in one of your favorite places, like the Outer Cape. You should wear Lilly on your birthday...or at least wear pink and green. You should pop your collar. You should start your celebrating early so you can laugh as much as possible. You should be able to poke fun at your friends, and especially at yourself, and all have a good laugh at each other's expense. That is the sign of a great friendship...and can be cause to tinkle in your pants because you laugh so hard. You should eat and drink whatever you want on your birthday nachos and Pomtini's. You should sing out loud while riding in a jeep. You should stay up late and dance.

You probably shouldn't celebrate for 9 hours straight...Let's just say I can't go back to the Beachcomber this year. Good thing it is the end of the season. You shouldn't have to deal with "a lady" named Irene coming to your birthday weekend. That can result in your celebration ending early and that's not very fun. I am broken up with Irene.

You should continue your birthday weekend with your friends on Sunday morning, after driving home Saturday night to beat Irene. You shouldn't let a little Hurricane dampen your fun. You should fully embrace whatever adventure comes your way during your big birthday week and have fun with it....because your birthday only comes once a year...and you are worth it!

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